Rant!!!
I absolutely abhor irresponsible people and their really dimmed mind set. I’m currently stuck in the heart of Changi Airport replacing one of my promoters who shriek her responsibilities 4 hours before her work time schedule. I received a call from my manager at 1 am that I will have to stand in for a promoter at Changi Airport as she claimed to quit hours before her work. And Yes, her working hours starts from 6am, 6 bloody AM!.
I took a cab down to Changi Airport and was early in the queue to collect my visitor pass from the police counter. And when it was my turn, the police told me that they do not accept driver license. I tried twisting and making up stories for my “missing” ICs and out dated passport. But as law enforcers of Singapore, they wont even barge even if I slipped in a 50 dollars bill with my driving license. So I have to take a ‘road’ trip home to get my IC, because I would have to take an hour long trip back to the interchange and transfer to another bus. So in all I took 4 hours before I reached the airport for the second time that day. Mind you that I have taken an $18 taxi trip to the airport in the morning. DAMN IT!!
Even during my previous job at Siemens, my pay was $10/hr with commission, and still I did not want to work. And now for LG I’m paid $7/hr only. And I still have to return to my office to finish all my reports. Hey!! I’m not that despo for cash, I don’t need to work more than 12 hours a day or dual job to make ends meet. My ends are meeting fine already! Other than looking at all the world prestigious brands here, some stewardess now and then, I can really just rot here. I’m quite anti social to hard core mandarin speaking people, reason being I’m not exactly very fluent or comfortable with my mandarin and me and Cheena people can’t really click. Ah bengs and Davin no longer can connect, the way they speak and things that come out from their mouth will make me look at them with a raised eye brow.
Friday, October 12, 2007
Wednesday, October 03, 2007
This world is full of weird people, but I will specifically zoom in on one specie of weirdoes. I know many students work part time to gain extra income or plainly to support themselves because of the financial problems in their family. So they come to my company seeking a job, we will tell them that payment to them will only come 2 months after they have work, so theoretically if you work in the month of Sept, our month will only arrive on December, and subsequently you will receive your last 2 month pay.
Yes I know, 2 months is super long for many people who eagerly need the money, but rules are rules, you should not accept the job knowing the criteria and the negative point about it. After agreeing to the terms and condition and start to work for this company, you regretted the decision as the job is too tedious for your loser self. You start calling the in charge and bombarding them with hell loads of questions about when is my last month pay? We move back to the previous paragraph about me stating that the promoter will only receive their pay 2 months later. So what are these people talking about? (where is my last month pay) Either they are really foolish or they wanna make life difficult for everyone.
I have nothing to do with the finance and payment issues, but I try my best to help my colleagues. But I have been receiving calls from parents of these promoters who really couldn’t count. The dialogue goes like this,
Parent: “when is my daughter’s pay coming? You know we wanted so long already, what are you all doing?”
Me: “Madam, sorry to hear about it but would you provide me details about your daughter because I’m new here and which month did she worked?”
Parent: “Her name is Katherine, she worked on 27th and 28th of July, and we waited more than 60 days already.”
Me: “Sorry madam, July’s pay is not ready yet, we only do pay roll at the end of each month, so from 1st Sept to now (2nd Oct) it is only 31 days.”
Parent: “huh? Where have like this one? Since she work that week, count that week la. I’m going to get my lawyer to write a letter to MOM (Ministry of Manpower) or I’m going down to your company and complain.”
Me: “(Starting to get pissed) Madam, I assume you are working too, and you should know that pay roll is only conducted at the end of every month so as to ensure the accounts will be correct. I really hope this issue can be solved privately and I request for your patience.
See? 31 days and they said more than 60 days? Are they illiterate or don’t have enough fingers to count? And lawyer consultation is not free or cheap, when people really have a lawyer as back up, they won’t abuse it like these weirdoes.
Yes I know, 2 months is super long for many people who eagerly need the money, but rules are rules, you should not accept the job knowing the criteria and the negative point about it. After agreeing to the terms and condition and start to work for this company, you regretted the decision as the job is too tedious for your loser self. You start calling the in charge and bombarding them with hell loads of questions about when is my last month pay? We move back to the previous paragraph about me stating that the promoter will only receive their pay 2 months later. So what are these people talking about? (where is my last month pay) Either they are really foolish or they wanna make life difficult for everyone.
I have nothing to do with the finance and payment issues, but I try my best to help my colleagues. But I have been receiving calls from parents of these promoters who really couldn’t count. The dialogue goes like this,
Parent: “when is my daughter’s pay coming? You know we wanted so long already, what are you all doing?”
Me: “Madam, sorry to hear about it but would you provide me details about your daughter because I’m new here and which month did she worked?”
Parent: “Her name is Katherine, she worked on 27th and 28th of July, and we waited more than 60 days already.”
Me: “Sorry madam, July’s pay is not ready yet, we only do pay roll at the end of each month, so from 1st Sept to now (2nd Oct) it is only 31 days.”
Parent: “huh? Where have like this one? Since she work that week, count that week la. I’m going to get my lawyer to write a letter to MOM (Ministry of Manpower) or I’m going down to your company and complain.”
Me: “(Starting to get pissed) Madam, I assume you are working too, and you should know that pay roll is only conducted at the end of every month so as to ensure the accounts will be correct. I really hope this issue can be solved privately and I request for your patience.
See? 31 days and they said more than 60 days? Are they illiterate or don’t have enough fingers to count? And lawyer consultation is not free or cheap, when people really have a lawyer as back up, they won’t abuse it like these weirdoes.
Saturday, September 22, 2007
Let me introduce 2 phones that became the talk of the town in the recent months, Prada KE850 and I Phone. Speculations of I Phone launching this year in Singapore have been battered by the news released by Apple that it will not occur this year. Though an intellectual or I will say a computer whiz kid managed to crack the code for the I Phone to be used here in Singapore, I will not guarantee he will not be taken to court. The Prada phone definitely packed a punch for me, though technology wise it can never compete head to head with the I Phone. The 2 phones are about the same size and they are equally thin.
The sleek design of the phone makes you want to look at it again even after you have been staring at it the whole day. With its glossy and perfectly polished surface all around it, it definitely shines better than any pedicure or manicure ever done. The interface of the phone is astonishing, the best I used thus far after using and trying countless phones. It is a touch screen surface, exactly the same as the I-Phone and the sensitiveness of the screen work wonders even for a big finger person like me.
Yes, with such glossy surface, finger prints will stain all over, but fear not, a cloth from a nicely packed tiny envelope both featuring the Prada logo will solve this problem. Worry about the phone getting scratched? No worries, the package comes with a leather casing printed with the Prada logo. You must be thinking what about listening to music, people may ask, don’t tell me Prada head set; I will laugh at u Davin. Errrr.. Yap! Prada has their own signature head set for u too. What a package of Prada stuff ya? Quickly head down to a dealer shop or operator near u today!! Only $1,100 now!!
The Prada phone is THE luxurious phone to own, just imagine walking down town or even in a club holding a drink with your left and a Prada with your right when the techno coloured disco lights dance around you. Heads turns with awe and you can definitely smell the breath of those green-eyed monsters who want to catch a glimpse of your phone without you looking at them.
I'm currently carrying one Prada, can be made available for your viewing pleasure.
Tuesday, September 18, 2007
Training suck
Went through a horrendous training at Changi Airport yesterday, learnt nothing really useful after sitting on the same chair from 9.30am to 5pm. Oh, did I mention that all my promoters were late? The training started at 8.30am, thank goodness we were late if not we will have to go through another hour of hell. And YES, Wilson from LG mobile had a long and black face, when we arrived.
The training was about customer service, an overall view of what to do / what not to do in certain scenarios in Changi Airport. I thought the training was meant for the project I’m overseeing which is a 3 weeks long road show from 7am-10pm daily inside the departure area. What else is there to learn about CRM when I already went through abundant talks by many good speakers on my own? And with the number of CRM subjects I took up in school, my experience as a promoter, I believe I can teach this subject adding in a mixture of marketing and sales technique on the way.
Had some problems with a mother who demanded her child and his friends’ pay, she was a loud mouth and refused to talk things out in proper terms. I told her she needed to reveal her son and his friends name so I can check the details out for them. She insisted there was not a need and was reluctant to reveal anything. She said that tomorrow the boys will be heading down to the office and are willing to wait the whole day for their pay, she claims to be handling bills in her office, but she seems to ignore the fact that no company are allowed to issue payments without verifying the details. At last my manager spoke to her and she promised to reveal the details but failed to do so. But I managed to get the boys’ names with my source of contact. :)
The most burdensome issues were that she commerce in Chinese throughout the entire conversation. Damn. I was trying so hard to explain w/o having to use English terms in the process, but as usual, I failed miserably again. And I kept telling her I can’t do anything about the pay out as I do not handle finance. But I was willing to go the extra mile to get the details for her. She started calling me last night and I told her once I got the details I will get back to her, but I was stuck in a meeting from morning and when I did not answer her call and replied her via sms, she started saying I was playing tricks and all. And after that she questioned my dignity by claiming that I do not dare to answer the phone twice. I was not angry but was in shocked because; hey! I’m trying to help u here w/o any incentives ok..
Went through a horrendous training at Changi Airport yesterday, learnt nothing really useful after sitting on the same chair from 9.30am to 5pm. Oh, did I mention that all my promoters were late? The training started at 8.30am, thank goodness we were late if not we will have to go through another hour of hell. And YES, Wilson from LG mobile had a long and black face, when we arrived.
The training was about customer service, an overall view of what to do / what not to do in certain scenarios in Changi Airport. I thought the training was meant for the project I’m overseeing which is a 3 weeks long road show from 7am-10pm daily inside the departure area. What else is there to learn about CRM when I already went through abundant talks by many good speakers on my own? And with the number of CRM subjects I took up in school, my experience as a promoter, I believe I can teach this subject adding in a mixture of marketing and sales technique on the way.
Had some problems with a mother who demanded her child and his friends’ pay, she was a loud mouth and refused to talk things out in proper terms. I told her she needed to reveal her son and his friends name so I can check the details out for them. She insisted there was not a need and was reluctant to reveal anything. She said that tomorrow the boys will be heading down to the office and are willing to wait the whole day for their pay, she claims to be handling bills in her office, but she seems to ignore the fact that no company are allowed to issue payments without verifying the details. At last my manager spoke to her and she promised to reveal the details but failed to do so. But I managed to get the boys’ names with my source of contact. :)
The most burdensome issues were that she commerce in Chinese throughout the entire conversation. Damn. I was trying so hard to explain w/o having to use English terms in the process, but as usual, I failed miserably again. And I kept telling her I can’t do anything about the pay out as I do not handle finance. But I was willing to go the extra mile to get the details for her. She started calling me last night and I told her once I got the details I will get back to her, but I was stuck in a meeting from morning and when I did not answer her call and replied her via sms, she started saying I was playing tricks and all. And after that she questioned my dignity by claiming that I do not dare to answer the phone twice. I was not angry but was in shocked because; hey! I’m trying to help u here w/o any incentives ok..
Friday, September 14, 2007
Yeah. A change of the blog’s skin, with a simple yet sleek black background since my relaxing sun picture went down for so many months and I did not do anything about it.
I have improvised a second round of IPP for myself, but this time I will say it is self placement. I had 4 calls from different companies; 1st is M1, 2nd Samsung (has nothing to do with the gf’s dad), 3rd Nokia and lastly Essential Venture Enterprise. So I had a few days to ponder and quickly make a choice as all wanted me to begin work soon.
So I sat down and thought about it;
1) M1 offers $8/hr = $72/day or $2160/mth
2) Samsung is a week end job offering $10/hr= $90/day and $720/mth and allowing me to take up week day job.
3) Nokia without a shout of a doubt was my favorite choice offering around $3000 if I perform well with commission
4) Then Essential called me, they are an event management company, I told them I was busy and will call them back, but apparently I did not. So one afternoon, when I was still asleep, the boss called me, told me to come down for interview and he will pay for my cab fare, I was like huh?, where in the world someone will offer such a thing. After discussing, it is a 5.5 days/week job offering just a plain $1,200.
Call me dumb or dumb’s bro dumber, but I choose the last job which pay the least. My reasons being that I have enough experience working in the mobile sales line for a couple of years on and off. And I did not like it because all promoters are Chinese speaking leaving me confuse with what they meant. And I wanted real hands on experience this time, something I can pick up along the way. I want to tell myself when I leave the company on 31st Oct that I have accomplished something.
My job scopes are handling 50 odd promoters for LG mobile and the number is growing rapidly when I took over after the previous guy in charge left. On Monday and Tuesday, I will have to do marketing report to be sent to LG weekly for all the sales figure the promoters obtained over the week end. I have to incorporate all the details I have from their 4 page time sheet each week and the report contains both qualitative and quantitative figure.
On Wednesday and Thursday, I will have to draft up the deployment list of where all this promoters will go on the week end. Damn this suck when u has a bunch of promoters who look or speaks like gangsters. On Saturday and Sunday I will have to check if they are there physically at the shop and whether is on time. For those sickening assholes that back out last min, I will rush to find a replacement. My boss will call me like every other min for updates of the situation. After work on Saturday, I will have to head down to certain locations to check on the promoters. At night, I will have to get the sales figure from all the promoters even when I’m going for a movie. So I’m like practically working everyday of the week. Shag but learning.
I have improvised a second round of IPP for myself, but this time I will say it is self placement. I had 4 calls from different companies; 1st is M1, 2nd Samsung (has nothing to do with the gf’s dad), 3rd Nokia and lastly Essential Venture Enterprise. So I had a few days to ponder and quickly make a choice as all wanted me to begin work soon.
So I sat down and thought about it;
1) M1 offers $8/hr = $72/day or $2160/mth
2) Samsung is a week end job offering $10/hr= $90/day and $720/mth and allowing me to take up week day job.
3) Nokia without a shout of a doubt was my favorite choice offering around $3000 if I perform well with commission
4) Then Essential called me, they are an event management company, I told them I was busy and will call them back, but apparently I did not. So one afternoon, when I was still asleep, the boss called me, told me to come down for interview and he will pay for my cab fare, I was like huh?, where in the world someone will offer such a thing. After discussing, it is a 5.5 days/week job offering just a plain $1,200.
Call me dumb or dumb’s bro dumber, but I choose the last job which pay the least. My reasons being that I have enough experience working in the mobile sales line for a couple of years on and off. And I did not like it because all promoters are Chinese speaking leaving me confuse with what they meant. And I wanted real hands on experience this time, something I can pick up along the way. I want to tell myself when I leave the company on 31st Oct that I have accomplished something.
My job scopes are handling 50 odd promoters for LG mobile and the number is growing rapidly when I took over after the previous guy in charge left. On Monday and Tuesday, I will have to do marketing report to be sent to LG weekly for all the sales figure the promoters obtained over the week end. I have to incorporate all the details I have from their 4 page time sheet each week and the report contains both qualitative and quantitative figure.
On Wednesday and Thursday, I will have to draft up the deployment list of where all this promoters will go on the week end. Damn this suck when u has a bunch of promoters who look or speaks like gangsters. On Saturday and Sunday I will have to check if they are there physically at the shop and whether is on time. For those sickening assholes that back out last min, I will rush to find a replacement. My boss will call me like every other min for updates of the situation. After work on Saturday, I will have to head down to certain locations to check on the promoters. At night, I will have to get the sales figure from all the promoters even when I’m going for a movie. So I’m like practically working everyday of the week. Shag but learning.
Wednesday, August 08, 2007
i completed the marathon of projects. left with one presentation on Friday. i done my part of the report and is time for me to rest. IB presentation suck, a few of the guys were not prepared. it suck big time because this project is the one i place the most efforts, me and Leonard have a mutual understanding to take charge of a project each and do like 3/5 of the project and edit 1/5 of Ben and Kia how's work and re do the another 1/5 which is always out of point or right click drag copy, go to Microsoft documents, right click paste and change a few words. I took charge of Work Place Health Promotion which the report was not of my maximum standard but i just couldn't go on editing, Customer Relationship Management which i believe will be one of the best projects in class and do a join venture (JV) with Leonard to do Human Resource Management the entire project. for International Business and Compensation i help Leonard do all the major theory parts so he can have concentrate on the practical ones and have sufficient time to compile them well..
Sounds like a nerd right? damn.. too busy to even meet the gf. next sems, mr nice guy will go into hiding, out comes mr democratic and direct. gonna spilt the work up properly, sit there and discuss all the aspects and points to fulfill clearly so only minor editing is required. and anyone who produces shit quality work, copy and paste work or pretend to do work will really make me flare and penalise them, which is not in my practice, but for my sake, i will implentment this direct way next semster. Free riders will get the minimum points they deserve be it my current group or new group if we re organise.
p/s: really super pissed about today presentation.. F!
Sounds like a nerd right? damn.. too busy to even meet the gf. next sems, mr nice guy will go into hiding, out comes mr democratic and direct. gonna spilt the work up properly, sit there and discuss all the aspects and points to fulfill clearly so only minor editing is required. and anyone who produces shit quality work, copy and paste work or pretend to do work will really make me flare and penalise them, which is not in my practice, but for my sake, i will implentment this direct way next semster. Free riders will get the minimum points they deserve be it my current group or new group if we re organise.
p/s: really super pissed about today presentation.. F!
Wednesday, August 01, 2007
been a while since i blogged.. why? not because i'm lazy or anything, is just there the number of projects i have finished or are awaiting to be completed are numerous..
summary of my work:
Human Resource Management - Entire Section B
International Business- 13 page of PEST
- 6 Page of Cube model
Customer Service Management- Email with SIA and Qantas
- Marketing Report
- Compile the whole report
Compensation- Salary Structure with Leonard
- Competitors Analysis & Company's finanicial report
Workplace Health Promotion- Entire Section A with Leonard
Effective Business Report Writing- Secondary Analysis
i scared my self looking at it.. how much work i achieved by myself.. make myself sound like a hedonistic person, my work is for the team not for myself.. only person more stress than me in this class is Leonard.. lol.. gotta learn to draw the line between work and personal life..
i placed my priorities wrongly i feel, spent so much time on group projs and neglected my individual ones.. i hate people who spend so much time on their own work while their team mates work their ass off.. egocentric and individualistic tards.. idiosyncratic sucks.. the only beneficiary of individual work is you yourself and (Add your name) but group projects benefits you, team member 1,2,3 and 4..
Neglected the gf, the friends and the family.. i freakign need to spend more time on my personal life.. i need to spend more time with the gf.. damn... Feel super f up and lethargic lately, fatigue every minute of the day.. damn all the amount of shit i have to do.. no time to read the news some days or even play a game for a short while.. so think twice and keep it to yourself if you wanna complain how much work you have done.. because i have never complained when i did all these shit by myself..
Thursday, June 28, 2007
Friday, June 08, 2007
It has been a roller coaster week, filled with surge and fast and heart wrecking decend.
My heart was marred by stuffs that i got to know about.
Yes, i would say that my heart bleeds so badly and hurt so so much.
Knowing that i cant do anything to help the situations.
Sleepless nights and endless thoughts
this is what i have become
But fear not my love
All of this has made us stronger
I will dare swear that i would tell everyone
"Hey, I am really in love with this girl"
The pains will all vanish like how quickly they came
I have changed sweetie, this i promise you
No more snappy tempered boy
No more raising voice at you
No more walking away
Just your little animal who listens to you
Babe you must have realised
That in the past i can be the best bf and i can be the worst
But from now onwards,
You will only have the best cause you derserve the best
For you've filled my life with colours and joy
For you've filled my heart with love and concerns
For you've mermerise me with your gentle and beautiful self
My heart was marred by stuffs that i got to know about.
Yes, i would say that my heart bleeds so badly and hurt so so much.
Knowing that i cant do anything to help the situations.
Sleepless nights and endless thoughts
this is what i have become
But fear not my love
All of this has made us stronger
I will dare swear that i would tell everyone
"Hey, I am really in love with this girl"
The pains will all vanish like how quickly they came
I have changed sweetie, this i promise you
No more snappy tempered boy
No more raising voice at you
No more walking away
Just your little animal who listens to you
Babe you must have realised
That in the past i can be the best bf and i can be the worst
But from now onwards,
You will only have the best cause you derserve the best
For you've filled my life with colours and joy
For you've filled my heart with love and concerns
For you've mermerise me with your gentle and beautiful self
Tuesday, June 05, 2007
Monday, June 04, 2007
Friday, April 27, 2007
LESSON 4
There were these 4 guys, a Russian, a German,
an American and a French,
who found this small genie bottle. When they
rubbed the bottle, a genie appeared.
Thankful that the 4 guys had released
him out of the bottle,
He said, "Next to you all are 4 swimming pools, I
will give each of you A wish.
When you run towards the pool and
jump, you shout what you want the pool of Water to become,
Then your wish will come true."
The French wanted to start.
He ran towards the pool, jumped and
shouted “WINE".
The pool immediately changed into a pool of wine.
The Frenchman was so happy swimming and drinking from the pool.
Next is the Russian's turn, he did the same and
shouted, VODKA" and Immersed himself
into a pool of vodka.
The German was next and he jumped and shouted, "BEER".
He was so contented with his beer pool.
The last is the American. He was running towards
the pool and suddenly he steps on a banana peel.
He slipped towards the pool and shouted,”SHIT!!!!!!!........."
You can decide what had happened that day.
*LESSON IV - THINK TWICE BEFORE
YOU SAY SOMETHING, BECAUSE
SOMETIMES ACCIDENTS DO HAPPEN.*
LESSON 5
The organs of the body were having a meeting;
they were trying to decide who was in charge.
Each organ took a turn to speak up:
-Brain.... I should be in charge because I run
all the bodies’ functions.
-Blood........ I should be in charge because I
circulate oxygen for the brain.
-Stomach... I should be in charge because I process
food to the brain.
-Legs......... I should be in charge because I take
the brain where it wants to go.
-Eyes......... I should be in charge
because I let the brain see where it's going.
-Asshole.....I should be in charge because I get
rid of your waste.
>>> All the other parts laughed so hard and this made
the ass hole very mad.
To prove his point, the asshole immediately
slammed tightly closed and
Stayed that way for 6 days, refusing to rid the
body of any waste whatsoever.
Day 1 - Brain got a terrible headache and cried
out for relief
Day 2 - Stomach got bloated and
began to ache terribly
Day 3 - Legs got cramps and became unstable
Day 4 - Eyes became watery and vision became blurred
Day 5 - Blood became toxic and poisoned the body
Day 6 -The other organs agreed to
let the asshole be in charge.
*MORAL OF THE STORY: NO MATTER WHO YOU ARE, OR HOW
IMPORTANT YOU THINK YOU ARE, YOU WILL FIND THAT IT IS ALWAYS
THE ASSHOLE THAT IS IN CHARGE.*
There were these 4 guys, a Russian, a German,
an American and a French,
who found this small genie bottle. When they
rubbed the bottle, a genie appeared.
Thankful that the 4 guys had released
him out of the bottle,
He said, "Next to you all are 4 swimming pools, I
will give each of you A wish.
When you run towards the pool and
jump, you shout what you want the pool of Water to become,
Then your wish will come true."
The French wanted to start.
He ran towards the pool, jumped and
shouted “WINE".
The pool immediately changed into a pool of wine.
The Frenchman was so happy swimming and drinking from the pool.
Next is the Russian's turn, he did the same and
shouted, VODKA" and Immersed himself
into a pool of vodka.
The German was next and he jumped and shouted, "BEER".
He was so contented with his beer pool.
The last is the American. He was running towards
the pool and suddenly he steps on a banana peel.
He slipped towards the pool and shouted,”SHIT!!!!!!!........."
You can decide what had happened that day.
*LESSON IV - THINK TWICE BEFORE
YOU SAY SOMETHING, BECAUSE
SOMETIMES ACCIDENTS DO HAPPEN.*
LESSON 5
The organs of the body were having a meeting;
they were trying to decide who was in charge.
Each organ took a turn to speak up:
-Brain.... I should be in charge because I run
all the bodies’ functions.
-Blood........ I should be in charge because I
circulate oxygen for the brain.
-Stomach... I should be in charge because I process
food to the brain.
-Legs......... I should be in charge because I take
the brain where it wants to go.
-Eyes......... I should be in charge
because I let the brain see where it's going.
-Asshole.....I should be in charge because I get
rid of your waste.
>>> All the other parts laughed so hard and this made
the ass hole very mad.
To prove his point, the asshole immediately
slammed tightly closed and
Stayed that way for 6 days, refusing to rid the
body of any waste whatsoever.
Day 1 - Brain got a terrible headache and cried
out for relief
Day 2 - Stomach got bloated and
began to ache terribly
Day 3 - Legs got cramps and became unstable
Day 4 - Eyes became watery and vision became blurred
Day 5 - Blood became toxic and poisoned the body
Day 6 -The other organs agreed to
let the asshole be in charge.
*MORAL OF THE STORY: NO MATTER WHO YOU ARE, OR HOW
IMPORTANT YOU THINK YOU ARE, YOU WILL FIND THAT IT IS ALWAYS
THE ASSHOLE THAT IS IN CHARGE.*
Thursday, April 26, 2007
LESSON 3
An American and Japanese were sitting on the
plane on the plane.
When the American turned to the Japanese and asked,
"What kind of -ESE are you?"
The Japanese confused, replied, "Sorry but I don't
understand what you mean.”
The American repeated, "What kind of -ESE are you?"
Again, the Japanese was confused over the question.
The American, now irritated, then yelled, "What
kind of –ESE are you...
Are you a Chinese, Japanese, Vietnamese! Etc......?!?!?"
The Japanese then replied, "Oh, I am a Japanese."
A while later the Japanese turned to the American
and asked what kind of 'key' was he.
The American, frustrated, yelled, "What do you
mean what kind of –key am i?!
The Japanese said, "Are you a Yankee, donkee, or monkee?"
*LESSON III - NEVER INSULT ANYONE.*
An American and Japanese were sitting on the
plane on the plane.
When the American turned to the Japanese and asked,
"What kind of -ESE are you?"
The Japanese confused, replied, "Sorry but I don't
understand what you mean.”
The American repeated, "What kind of -ESE are you?"
Again, the Japanese was confused over the question.
The American, now irritated, then yelled, "What
kind of –ESE are you...
Are you a Chinese, Japanese, Vietnamese! Etc......?!?!?"
The Japanese then replied, "Oh, I am a Japanese."
A while later the Japanese turned to the American
and asked what kind of 'key' was he.
The American, frustrated, yelled, "What do you
mean what kind of –key am i?!
The Japanese said, "Are you a Yankee, donkee, or monkee?"
*LESSON III - NEVER INSULT ANYONE.*
Friday, April 20, 2007
LESSON 2
Standing in front of a shredder
with a piece of paper in his hand.
"Listen," said the CEO,
"this is a very sensitive and important
document, and my secretary has left.
Can you make this thing work?"
"Certainly," said the young executive.
He turned the machine on,
inserted the paper, and
pressed the start button.
”Excellent, excellent!" said the CEO as his paper
disappeared inside the shredder machine.
"I just need one copy."
*LESSON II - NEVER, NEVER ASSUME THAT YOUR BOSS
KNOWS EVERYTHING.
Standing in front of a shredder
with a piece of paper in his hand.
"Listen," said the CEO,
"this is a very sensitive and important
document, and my secretary has left.
Can you make this thing work?"
"Certainly," said the young executive.
He turned the machine on,
inserted the paper, and
pressed the start button.
”Excellent, excellent!" said the CEO as his paper
disappeared inside the shredder machine.
"I just need one copy."
*LESSON II - NEVER, NEVER ASSUME THAT YOUR BOSS
KNOWS EVERYTHING.
Thursday, April 19, 2007
The next 5 articles will be some stuff you wanna learn thru some hilarious lessons..
LESSON 1
A junior manager, a senior manager and their boss
are on their way to a meeting.
On their way through a park,
they come across a wonder lamp.
They rub the lamp and a ghost appears.
The ghost says, "Normally, one is granted three
wishes but since there are 3 of you,
I will only allow one wish each"
So the eager senior manager shouted,
"I want the first wish.
I want to be in the Bahamas,
on a fast boat and have no worries."
Pfufffff, and he was gone.
Now the junior manager could not keep quiet and
shouted "I want to be In Florida with beautiful girls,
plenty of food and cocktails."
Pfufffff, and he was also gone.
The boss calmly said,
"I want these two idiots back in
my office after lunch at 12.35pm."
*MORAL OF THE STORY:
"ALWAYS ALLOW THE BOSSES TO SPEAK FIRST"*
LESSON 1
A junior manager, a senior manager and their boss
are on their way to a meeting.
On their way through a park,
they come across a wonder lamp.
They rub the lamp and a ghost appears.
The ghost says, "Normally, one is granted three
wishes but since there are 3 of you,
I will only allow one wish each"
So the eager senior manager shouted,
"I want the first wish.
I want to be in the Bahamas,
on a fast boat and have no worries."
Pfufffff, and he was gone.
Now the junior manager could not keep quiet and
shouted "I want to be In Florida with beautiful girls,
plenty of food and cocktails."
Pfufffff, and he was also gone.
The boss calmly said,
"I want these two idiots back in
my office after lunch at 12.35pm."
*MORAL OF THE STORY:
"ALWAYS ALLOW THE BOSSES TO SPEAK FIRST"*
Wednesday, April 18, 2007
One Chinese person walks into a bar in America
late one night and he saw Steven Spielberg.
As he was a great fan of his movies,
he rushes over to him, and asks for his autograph.
Instead, Spielberg gives him a slap
and says "You Chinese People bombed our Pearl Harbour,
get out of here!!"
The astonished Chinese man replied "It was not the
Chinese who bombed your Pearl Harbour, it was the Japanese".
”Chinese, Japanese, Taiwanese,
you're all the same,” replied Spielberg.
In return, the Chinese
gives Spielberg a slap and says "You sank the
Titanic; my forefathers were on that ship."
Shocked, Spielberg replies "It was the iceberg
that sank the Titanic not me.”
The Chinese replies, "Iceberg, Spielberg, Carlsberg,
you’re all the same!!”
late one night and he saw Steven Spielberg.
As he was a great fan of his movies,
he rushes over to him, and asks for his autograph.
Instead, Spielberg gives him a slap
and says "You Chinese People bombed our Pearl Harbour,
get out of here!!"
The astonished Chinese man replied "It was not the
Chinese who bombed your Pearl Harbour, it was the Japanese".
”Chinese, Japanese, Taiwanese,
you're all the same,” replied Spielberg.
In return, the Chinese
gives Spielberg a slap and says "You sank the
Titanic; my forefathers were on that ship."
Shocked, Spielberg replies "It was the iceberg
that sank the Titanic not me.”
The Chinese replies, "Iceberg, Spielberg, Carlsberg,
you’re all the same!!”
Tuesday, April 17, 2007
5 simple articles for the next 5 days, no racism involved, so please laugh if it gets funny and zip up if you wanna add some stuff about it..
SMART INDIAN
Father: I want you to marry a girl of my choice.
Son: "I will choose my own bride!! My love is Butaya from next door!!"
Father: "But the girl is Bill Gates’s daughter...”
Son : "The guy with the Vi-sa (Microsoft Window Vista) that runs in a white box called Come-PeTer (Computer)?? (Peter Samy from the back ground yells, "what you want, dont ask me anyhow come k?!") I guess why not?! "
Next, Father approaches Bill Gates.
Father: "I have a husband for your daughter...."
Bill Gates: "But my daughter is too young to marry!!!!!"
Father: "But this young man is a vice-president of the World Bank. In my homeland, age is never a problem. She will learn to grow into him.”
Bill Gates: "Ah i see, can we start the planning now? We can format it in Powerpoint, Word, Excel or my latest Vista! * grinning to himself (for the sake of my business, why not?)"
Finally Father goes to see the president of the World Bank.
Father: "I have a young man to be recommended as a vice president.”
President: "But I already have more vice- presidents than I need!"
Father: "But this young man is Bill Gates's son-in-law."
President: "Ah, (Free SOFTWARES!!) in that case...ok"
That is how Indians do business. Take a "nothing" and convert it to success..
SMART INDIAN
Father: I want you to marry a girl of my choice.
Son: "I will choose my own bride!! My love is Butaya from next door!!"
Father: "But the girl is Bill Gates’s daughter...”
Son : "The guy with the Vi-sa (Microsoft Window Vista) that runs in a white box called Come-PeTer (Computer)?? (Peter Samy from the back ground yells, "what you want, dont ask me anyhow come k?!") I guess why not?! "
Next, Father approaches Bill Gates.
Father: "I have a husband for your daughter...."
Bill Gates: "But my daughter is too young to marry!!!!!"
Father: "But this young man is a vice-president of the World Bank. In my homeland, age is never a problem. She will learn to grow into him.”
Bill Gates: "Ah i see, can we start the planning now? We can format it in Powerpoint, Word, Excel or my latest Vista! * grinning to himself (for the sake of my business, why not?)"
Finally Father goes to see the president of the World Bank.
Father: "I have a young man to be recommended as a vice president.”
President: "But I already have more vice- presidents than I need!"
Father: "But this young man is Bill Gates's son-in-law."
President: "Ah, (Free SOFTWARES!!) in that case...ok"
That is how Indians do business. Take a "nothing" and convert it to success..
Friday, April 13, 2007
A Tribute to Manchester United
Probably the best among all the superior football clubs this season, with another chance of having a go for a Treble. A Treble means a team has to win the EPL title, the FA cup and the glorious UEFA CHAMPION LEAGUE.
Manchester United suffered one mournful tragedy in 6 February 1958, after refuelling in Munich on 6 February 1958, the United aeroplane crashed, killing twenty-two people, including seven players – Byrne, Colman, Jones, Pegg, Taylor, Geoff Bent and Liam Whelan. Duncan Edwards became the eighth player to die of his injuries, fifteen days later in a German hospital.
The club, the city of Manchester and the English game entered a long period of mourning, and it seemed inconceivable that United could ever recover from such an appalling disaster.
But in 1986, Sir Alex Ferguson joined Manchester United as their head coach. He was criticized as for 8 seasons, he has not achieved an EPL Title but that will not stop him from unleashing a force all the teams in the world would not want to reckon with.
Sir Alex Ferguson is the most successful manager in British football history – winning 18 major trophies during his time in charge of the Reds. Yet despite almost two decades at the Old Trafford helm he remains focused on increasing that tally, bringing yet more silverware to Manchester United.
The silver wares were 7 EPL Title (1993, 1994, 1996, 1997, 1999, 2000, 2001, 2003), 1 UEFA CHAMPION LEAGUE (1999), 5 FA Cup (1990, 1994, 1996, 1999, 2004), 2 LEAGUE Cup (1992, 2006), and an UEFA Cup (1991), INTERCONTENTAL Cup (1991) and some other UEFA cups.
In the season of 1999, Manchester United moved on to be the first team to ever achieve a Treble. The Treble became a quadruple later in the year when Sir Alex Ferguson's men travelled to Tokyo to compete for the Inter-Continental Cup. Keane's goal against Palmeiras of Brazil bestowed upon United the title of World Club Champions. Officially, at the end of the millennium, the biggest football club in the world had also become the best in the world!
Unfortunately, from the season of 2003/04 to 2005/06, Manchester United only manage one silverware which was the League Cup. People began to write of Man United as a title contender after Jose Mourinho and Roman came into picture with Billion dollar of spending power. Chelsea was transformed overnight to the world most expensive team, even surpassing the all star team of Real Madrid.
But the people and reporters who wrote off Man United was so so wrong. This season of 2006/07, Man United is on the road once again to achieve yet another Treble. They are in the semi-final for the UEFA CHAMPION LEAGUE, top in the EPL table and also in the semi-final for the FA Cup. A true Champion needs luck and a lot of blessing from GOD, may the Lord bless this team who worked so hard for everything
Probably the best among all the superior football clubs this season, with another chance of having a go for a Treble. A Treble means a team has to win the EPL title, the FA cup and the glorious UEFA CHAMPION LEAGUE.
Manchester United suffered one mournful tragedy in 6 February 1958, after refuelling in Munich on 6 February 1958, the United aeroplane crashed, killing twenty-two people, including seven players – Byrne, Colman, Jones, Pegg, Taylor, Geoff Bent and Liam Whelan. Duncan Edwards became the eighth player to die of his injuries, fifteen days later in a German hospital.
The club, the city of Manchester and the English game entered a long period of mourning, and it seemed inconceivable that United could ever recover from such an appalling disaster.
But in 1986, Sir Alex Ferguson joined Manchester United as their head coach. He was criticized as for 8 seasons, he has not achieved an EPL Title but that will not stop him from unleashing a force all the teams in the world would not want to reckon with.
Sir Alex Ferguson is the most successful manager in British football history – winning 18 major trophies during his time in charge of the Reds. Yet despite almost two decades at the Old Trafford helm he remains focused on increasing that tally, bringing yet more silverware to Manchester United.
The silver wares were 7 EPL Title (1993, 1994, 1996, 1997, 1999, 2000, 2001, 2003), 1 UEFA CHAMPION LEAGUE (1999), 5 FA Cup (1990, 1994, 1996, 1999, 2004), 2 LEAGUE Cup (1992, 2006), and an UEFA Cup (1991), INTERCONTENTAL Cup (1991) and some other UEFA cups.
In the season of 1999, Manchester United moved on to be the first team to ever achieve a Treble. The Treble became a quadruple later in the year when Sir Alex Ferguson's men travelled to Tokyo to compete for the Inter-Continental Cup. Keane's goal against Palmeiras of Brazil bestowed upon United the title of World Club Champions. Officially, at the end of the millennium, the biggest football club in the world had also become the best in the world!
Unfortunately, from the season of 2003/04 to 2005/06, Manchester United only manage one silverware which was the League Cup. People began to write of Man United as a title contender after Jose Mourinho and Roman came into picture with Billion dollar of spending power. Chelsea was transformed overnight to the world most expensive team, even surpassing the all star team of Real Madrid.
But the people and reporters who wrote off Man United was so so wrong. This season of 2006/07, Man United is on the road once again to achieve yet another Treble. They are in the semi-final for the UEFA CHAMPION LEAGUE, top in the EPL table and also in the semi-final for the FA Cup. A true Champion needs luck and a lot of blessing from GOD, may the Lord bless this team who worked so hard for everything
Thursday, April 12, 2007
OH what a night!
They say Rome wasn’t built in a day, but the Romans were certainly brought to their knees in just an hour and a half at Old Trafford. They got their ass kicked Spartan style but in the form of a football match. No casualties were calculated, but pride, honor, fame and reputation fell like how each Persian’s soldier fell with blood ousting out of their wounds in the epic movie of 300.
Man United Epic Movie came in a match of the CHAMPION LEAGUE quarter-final when the Reds ran riots in their own back yard of Old Trafford, with many mouth watering and quality goals in a match that left the fans on the edge of their seat through out the whole game.
In 19 mins, Man United was 3-0 with Michael Carrick, Alan Smith and Rooney on the score board. Carrick gave United the lead with a stunning, spontaneous stike from Michael Carrick in the 12th minute. Smith claimed the second with a run into the area and with a tap into the empty net. Rooney who had a goal drought whose goal in the previous game gave the Reds hope added the 3rd goal, tucking the ball home into the lower corner.
Ronaldo added 2 goals to the tally with one stunner each coming before and right after the half time mark. Carrick moved on to claim his second of the night with a superb curler floated into the top corner from outside the penalty box. Obviously the resistance from the Romans was futile.
At 6-0 down, they manage to pull one back with a one touch volley from De Rosi and claim their hard earned consolation goal. The Reds fans were not through with 6 goals, despite being hoarse after a 6 goal celebration, they wanted more!! Subsitute Patrick Evra answered their call with a hammering shot in and off the goal post of the exasperated and sorrowful Doni, Roma’s keepers. Never in his life had he felt the way he had that night.
The Reds and their fans were in seventh heaven, 7 goals in a game after enduring years of low scoring in the Champion League. Many will say this performance has surpass that of the liverpool’s in Istanbul, they never agrees but deep in their mind, they know that this performance is one they never can match.
How did I celebrate? I could’t sleep after that match, I was wide awake with the excitement that is yet to come. Another shot at the Treble I presume. I wore the Man Utd jersey after I almost torn the t-shirt I was wearing when Man Utd went on a rampage. Certainly, the Romans were dejected and remorseful after the match. Man Utd fought like warriors against all odds that they have a list of injuried players.
They say Rome wasn’t built in a day, but the Romans were certainly brought to their knees in just an hour and a half at Old Trafford. They got their ass kicked Spartan style but in the form of a football match. No casualties were calculated, but pride, honor, fame and reputation fell like how each Persian’s soldier fell with blood ousting out of their wounds in the epic movie of 300.
Man United Epic Movie came in a match of the CHAMPION LEAGUE quarter-final when the Reds ran riots in their own back yard of Old Trafford, with many mouth watering and quality goals in a match that left the fans on the edge of their seat through out the whole game.
In 19 mins, Man United was 3-0 with Michael Carrick, Alan Smith and Rooney on the score board. Carrick gave United the lead with a stunning, spontaneous stike from Michael Carrick in the 12th minute. Smith claimed the second with a run into the area and with a tap into the empty net. Rooney who had a goal drought whose goal in the previous game gave the Reds hope added the 3rd goal, tucking the ball home into the lower corner.
Ronaldo added 2 goals to the tally with one stunner each coming before and right after the half time mark. Carrick moved on to claim his second of the night with a superb curler floated into the top corner from outside the penalty box. Obviously the resistance from the Romans was futile.
At 6-0 down, they manage to pull one back with a one touch volley from De Rosi and claim their hard earned consolation goal. The Reds fans were not through with 6 goals, despite being hoarse after a 6 goal celebration, they wanted more!! Subsitute Patrick Evra answered their call with a hammering shot in and off the goal post of the exasperated and sorrowful Doni, Roma’s keepers. Never in his life had he felt the way he had that night.
The Reds and their fans were in seventh heaven, 7 goals in a game after enduring years of low scoring in the Champion League. Many will say this performance has surpass that of the liverpool’s in Istanbul, they never agrees but deep in their mind, they know that this performance is one they never can match.
How did I celebrate? I could’t sleep after that match, I was wide awake with the excitement that is yet to come. Another shot at the Treble I presume. I wore the Man Utd jersey after I almost torn the t-shirt I was wearing when Man Utd went on a rampage. Certainly, the Romans were dejected and remorseful after the match. Man Utd fought like warriors against all odds that they have a list of injuried players.
Wednesday, April 11, 2007
`Some knowledge to know
-If you yelled for 8 years, 7 months and 6 days you would have produced enough sound energy to heat one cup of coffee.
(Hardly seems worth it.)
-If you farted consistently for 6 years and 9 months, enough gas is produced to create the energy of an atomic bomb.
(Now that's more like it!)
-The human heart creates enough pressure when it pumps out to the body to squirt blood 30 feet.
(O.M.G.!)
-A pig's orgasm lasts 30 minutes.
(In my next life, I want to be a pig.)
-A cockroach will live nine days without its head before it starves to death.
(Creepy.)
-Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories a hour
(Don't try this at home,maybe at work)
-The male praying mantis cannot copulate while its head is attached to its body. The female initiates sex by ripping the male's head off.
("Darlin, I'm home. What the....?!")
-The flea can jump 350 times its body length. It's like a human jumping the length of a football field.
(If we can do that, we will put spiderman to shame)
-The catfish has over 27,000 taste buds.
(What could be so tasty on the bottom of a pond? )
-Some lions mate over 50 times a day.
(I still want to be a pig in my next life...quality over quantity)
-Butterflies taste with their feet.
(Who wanna try this?)
-The strongest muscle in the body is the tongue.
(Hmmmmmm... are you sure for a guy?)
Right-handed people live, on average, nine years longer than left-handed people.
(If you're ambidextrous, do you split the difference?)
-Elephants are the only animals that cannot jump.
(thank goodness! we dont need godzilla imposer here)
-A cat's urine glows under a black light.
(I wonder who was paid to figure that out?)
-An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.
(I know some people like that.)
-Starfish have no brains
(I know some people like that too.)
-Polar bears are left-handed.
(If they switch, they'll live a lot longer)
-Humans and dolphins are the only species that have sex for pleasure.
(What about that the pig??)
-If you yelled for 8 years, 7 months and 6 days you would have produced enough sound energy to heat one cup of coffee.
(Hardly seems worth it.)
-If you farted consistently for 6 years and 9 months, enough gas is produced to create the energy of an atomic bomb.
(Now that's more like it!)
-The human heart creates enough pressure when it pumps out to the body to squirt blood 30 feet.
(O.M.G.!)
-A pig's orgasm lasts 30 minutes.
(In my next life, I want to be a pig.)
-A cockroach will live nine days without its head before it starves to death.
(Creepy.)
-Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories a hour
(Don't try this at home,maybe at work)
-The male praying mantis cannot copulate while its head is attached to its body. The female initiates sex by ripping the male's head off.
("Darlin, I'm home. What the....?!")
-The flea can jump 350 times its body length. It's like a human jumping the length of a football field.
(If we can do that, we will put spiderman to shame)
-The catfish has over 27,000 taste buds.
(What could be so tasty on the bottom of a pond? )
-Some lions mate over 50 times a day.
(I still want to be a pig in my next life...quality over quantity)
-Butterflies taste with their feet.
(Who wanna try this?)
-The strongest muscle in the body is the tongue.
(Hmmmmmm... are you sure for a guy?)
Right-handed people live, on average, nine years longer than left-handed people.
(If you're ambidextrous, do you split the difference?)
-Elephants are the only animals that cannot jump.
(thank goodness! we dont need godzilla imposer here)
-A cat's urine glows under a black light.
(I wonder who was paid to figure that out?)
-An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.
(I know some people like that.)
-Starfish have no brains
(I know some people like that too.)
-Polar bears are left-handed.
(If they switch, they'll live a lot longer)
-Humans and dolphins are the only species that have sex for pleasure.
(What about that the pig??)
Tuesday, April 10, 2007
Monday, April 09, 2007
`a short and sweet story to remember
The Mayonnaise Jar
When things in your life seem almost too much to handle, when 24 hours in a
day are not enough, remember the mayonnaise jar...and the coffee...
A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items in front of
him. When the class began, wordlessly, he picked up a very large and empty
mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls. He then asked the
students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was.
So the professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the
jar. He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles rolled into the open areas
between the golf balls. He then asked the students again if the jar was
full. They agreed it was.
The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of
course, the sand filled up everything
else. He asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with a
unanimous "yes."
The professor then produced two cups of coffee from under the table and
poured the entire contents into the jar, effectively filling the empty space
between the sand. The students laughed.
"Now," said the professor, as the laughter subsided, " I want you to
recognize that this jar represents your life. The golf balls are the
important things- your God, family, your children, your health, your
friends, and your favorite passions-things that if everything else was lost
and only they remained, your life would still be full. The pebbles are the
other things that matter like your job, your house, and your car. The sand
is everything else-the small stuff."
"If you put the sand into the jar first," he continued, "there is no room
for the pebbles or the golf balls. The same goes for
life. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, you will
never have room for the things that are important to you. Pay attention to
the things that are critical to your happiness. Play with your children.
Take time to get medical checkups. Take your partner out to dinner. Play
another 18. There will always be time to clean the house and fix the
disposal. Take care of the golf balls first, the things that really matter.
Set your priorities. The rest is just sand."
One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the coffee
represented.
The professor smiled. "I'm glad you asked. It just goes to show you that no
matter how full your life may seem, there's always room for a couple of
cups of coffee with a friend."
The Mayonnaise Jar
When things in your life seem almost too much to handle, when 24 hours in a
day are not enough, remember the mayonnaise jar...and the coffee...
A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items in front of
him. When the class began, wordlessly, he picked up a very large and empty
mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls. He then asked the
students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was.
So the professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the
jar. He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles rolled into the open areas
between the golf balls. He then asked the students again if the jar was
full. They agreed it was.
The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of
course, the sand filled up everything
else. He asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with a
unanimous "yes."
The professor then produced two cups of coffee from under the table and
poured the entire contents into the jar, effectively filling the empty space
between the sand. The students laughed.
"Now," said the professor, as the laughter subsided, " I want you to
recognize that this jar represents your life. The golf balls are the
important things- your God, family, your children, your health, your
friends, and your favorite passions-things that if everything else was lost
and only they remained, your life would still be full. The pebbles are the
other things that matter like your job, your house, and your car. The sand
is everything else-the small stuff."
"If you put the sand into the jar first," he continued, "there is no room
for the pebbles or the golf balls. The same goes for
life. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, you will
never have room for the things that are important to you. Pay attention to
the things that are critical to your happiness. Play with your children.
Take time to get medical checkups. Take your partner out to dinner. Play
another 18. There will always be time to clean the house and fix the
disposal. Take care of the golf balls first, the things that really matter.
Set your priorities. The rest is just sand."
One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the coffee
represented.
The professor smiled. "I'm glad you asked. It just goes to show you that no
matter how full your life may seem, there's always room for a couple of
cups of coffee with a friend."
Tuesday, April 03, 2007
Effective ways to strengthen your Presentation
1. The success of a presentation depends on how the audience understands the presenter's frames of reference. Hence a presentation should be tailored towards the audience level of understanding and should avoid using jargons and words which only the presenter understands.
2. Adding animations and sounds to the presentation is creating "noise", it will distract the audience from the point you are trying to make. Hence it is important to keep the slides simple if you have an important point to make.
* Existence of Internal and External "noise"
-Example of internal noise are jargons or technical terms which the audience are not able to comprehend; and
-Example of external noise are later-comers, inattentive audience (audience yawning away) and etc.
3. Clichés not only exist in the form of words and phrases, but also pictures and animations. An example will be the screen beans. Try not to use the templates and pictures from the PowerPoint software, use unique pictures which are able to depict/ bring across the purpose to the audience instead.
These are only a few pointers i have learnt. There are many more methods you can think of with your creativity.
1. The success of a presentation depends on how the audience understands the presenter's frames of reference. Hence a presentation should be tailored towards the audience level of understanding and should avoid using jargons and words which only the presenter understands.
2. Adding animations and sounds to the presentation is creating "noise", it will distract the audience from the point you are trying to make. Hence it is important to keep the slides simple if you have an important point to make.
* Existence of Internal and External "noise"
-Example of internal noise are jargons or technical terms which the audience are not able to comprehend; and
-Example of external noise are later-comers, inattentive audience (audience yawning away) and etc.
3. Clichés not only exist in the form of words and phrases, but also pictures and animations. An example will be the screen beans. Try not to use the templates and pictures from the PowerPoint software, use unique pictures which are able to depict/ bring across the purpose to the audience instead.
These are only a few pointers i have learnt. There are many more methods you can think of with your creativity.
Monday, April 02, 2007
Phamton of the Opera
In the musical'sheart-wrenching story of the mysterious "Angel of Music" who lives beneath the Paris Opera House, the hideously disfigured Phantom falls in love with the young singer Christine, and devotes himself to creating a new opera star while exercising a reign of terror over the Opera House's occupants.
With a strong 130 crew and orchestra members, and armed with 230 made to the finest costumes, their extraordinary performance has been seen by over 80 million people worldwide, has been performed in more than 20 countries, won over 50 major theatre awards, and grossed more than S$5 billion.
Watching from the first few rows was such an incredile feeling, a eye opener to the world's reowned muscial group. With more than 2 hours of breath-taking, eye catching, astonishing and phenomenal scenes of singing and dancing, it was good enough to blow me away. Impressive, truly impressive.
In the musical'sheart-wrenching story of the mysterious "Angel of Music" who lives beneath the Paris Opera House, the hideously disfigured Phantom falls in love with the young singer Christine, and devotes himself to creating a new opera star while exercising a reign of terror over the Opera House's occupants.
With a strong 130 crew and orchestra members, and armed with 230 made to the finest costumes, their extraordinary performance has been seen by over 80 million people worldwide, has been performed in more than 20 countries, won over 50 major theatre awards, and grossed more than S$5 billion.
Watching from the first few rows was such an incredile feeling, a eye opener to the world's reowned muscial group. With more than 2 hours of breath-taking, eye catching, astonishing and phenomenal scenes of singing and dancing, it was good enough to blow me away. Impressive, truly impressive.
Friday, March 30, 2007
QUIT SMOKING CAMPAIGN BY DAVIN!
Hi my fellow smoking buddies, not like i literally smoke with you guys. I spent one hour drafting this out, so please have a heart to read it. This is not to preach to you guys about your where about when you move on after life or what will the Lord do to you. But just wanna bring you guys back to reality that smoking is of no benefits and use. Why waste $9.80 or more for a pack of Dunhill methol lights (my babe Lorraine), Marlboro w/wo Methol lights (Glenn, Tricia & Harrold) or Viceroy methol lights (Jen, Jason, Dan, Sherm) and occasionally L&M red (Ben why reds?)
Scientists have alway come up with a host of reasons why humans stick to bad habits like SMOKING.
Among their reasons:
Innate human defiance.
Inability to truly understand the nature of risk.
Individualistic view of the world and the ability to rationalize unhealthy habits.
Genetic predisposition to addiction.
My reasons:
1)Killer knowledge; Know about the consqueneces but is oblivious to it.
2)Everybody's doing it; Thinking why not? "Everyone around me is doing so, and i will be un-Cool if i was left out. Duh!"
3)Risky interpretations; Will think that they will quit soon, soon they say. When? ahem..
4)Need for social acceptance; Give me that reason and i will tell you bull shit!
Effects of SMOKING
Smokers who have heart failure can automatically eliminate a major source of stress on their heart by quitting. Each puff of nicotine from tobacco smoke temporarily increases heart rate and blood pressure, even as less oxygen-rich blood circulates through the body. Smoking also leads to clumping or stickiness in the blood vessels feeding the heart. People who quit smoking are more likely to have their heart failure symptoms improve. And smokers are rated the worst workers in the office and bed!
Ways to quit smoking:
1)Tell yourself now it's not too late to quit smoking.
2)Smoking is an addictive habit, dont say you cant, keep trying.
3)Set a quit date.
4)Throw your cigarettes away.
5)Try chewing gum is as a substitute for cigarettes.
6)Spend time with nonsmokers rather than with smokers. (Me!!)
7)Start an exercise program.
8)Keep your hands busy.
9)Take on new activities.
10)Consider using nicotine gum or nicotine patches.
11)Think of your loves one incorporating of your family, your special one and Davin who spent
one hour drafting this for you all!!
Quit smoking help line 1800 438 2000 or 91801880 (not toll free but better advices)
Hi my fellow smoking buddies, not like i literally smoke with you guys. I spent one hour drafting this out, so please have a heart to read it. This is not to preach to you guys about your where about when you move on after life or what will the Lord do to you. But just wanna bring you guys back to reality that smoking is of no benefits and use. Why waste $9.80 or more for a pack of Dunhill methol lights (my babe Lorraine), Marlboro w/wo Methol lights (Glenn, Tricia & Harrold) or Viceroy methol lights (Jen, Jason, Dan, Sherm) and occasionally L&M red (Ben why reds?)
Scientists have alway come up with a host of reasons why humans stick to bad habits like SMOKING.
Among their reasons:
Innate human defiance.
Inability to truly understand the nature of risk.
Individualistic view of the world and the ability to rationalize unhealthy habits.
Genetic predisposition to addiction.
My reasons:
1)Killer knowledge; Know about the consqueneces but is oblivious to it.
2)Everybody's doing it; Thinking why not? "Everyone around me is doing so, and i will be un-Cool if i was left out. Duh!"
3)Risky interpretations; Will think that they will quit soon, soon they say. When? ahem..
4)Need for social acceptance; Give me that reason and i will tell you bull shit!
Effects of SMOKING
Smokers who have heart failure can automatically eliminate a major source of stress on their heart by quitting. Each puff of nicotine from tobacco smoke temporarily increases heart rate and blood pressure, even as less oxygen-rich blood circulates through the body. Smoking also leads to clumping or stickiness in the blood vessels feeding the heart. People who quit smoking are more likely to have their heart failure symptoms improve. And smokers are rated the worst workers in the office and bed!
Ways to quit smoking:
1)Tell yourself now it's not too late to quit smoking.
2)Smoking is an addictive habit, dont say you cant, keep trying.
3)Set a quit date.
4)Throw your cigarettes away.
5)Try chewing gum is as a substitute for cigarettes.
6)Spend time with nonsmokers rather than with smokers. (Me!!)
7)Start an exercise program.
8)Keep your hands busy.
9)Take on new activities.
10)Consider using nicotine gum or nicotine patches.
11)Think of your loves one incorporating of your family, your special one and Davin who spent
one hour drafting this for you all!!
Quit smoking help line 1800 438 2000 or 91801880 (not toll free but better advices)
Wednesday, March 28, 2007
Business mind:
Wanna know why Singapore is the prefect place to carry out foreign investment? Here are the reasons why:
Singapore is a great location for business and for manufacturing because it has a great, very skillful workforce, a great community, safe and vibrant community, excellent infrastructure, and a very supportive environment for business. In addition, Singapore also has transparent, predictable and very reliable regulatory processes.
Wanna know why Singapore is the prefect place to carry out foreign investment? Here are the reasons why:
Singapore is a great location for business and for manufacturing because it has a great, very skillful workforce, a great community, safe and vibrant community, excellent infrastructure, and a very supportive environment for business. In addition, Singapore also has transparent, predictable and very reliable regulatory processes.
Tuesday, March 27, 2007
Entertainment news flash
"TMNT," (Dont tell me you dont know who they are?!) the action saga of the teenage mutant ninja turtles, grabbed US$25.4m and ousted the Greco-Persian war epic "300" from its two-week reign over North American theatres, according to figures from box-office tracker Exhibitor Relations.
Speaking about 300, i personally love the show to bits. Spartans?! A shout out to all pre-historic and war world I & II fans?! WHOO!! WHOO!! WHOO!!
The film has angered Iranian authorities who complain it portrays their ancient ancestors as savages(Had a great laugh). Come to think about it, the current Iranians are the same? Give up on that damn nuclear reactor will you, slaves bullies with gold laces all over the face..
Hollywood star Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt plans to build a "Rainbow" family, it stands for children of different ethnic groups all all over the world. The current activities they are carrying out deserve a loud shout out of praises all everyone. World Peace ya?
Jet Li is back, and back from B.C, he will be staring in a Chinese themed "Mummy 3", the popular epic story of Mummies from Egypt, wanna catch Mummies twisted with kung fu moves? Maybe this is the one?
Leonardo DiCaprio and Kate Winslet are to reunite on screen for the first time since their 1997 blockbuster "Titanic". The duo will star as a suburban couple struggling to grapple with post war disillusionment in an adaptation of Richard Yates's 1961 novel "Revolutionary Road." The guys must be wondering, "will there be any paintings again?" ^^
"TMNT," (Dont tell me you dont know who they are?!) the action saga of the teenage mutant ninja turtles, grabbed US$25.4m and ousted the Greco-Persian war epic "300" from its two-week reign over North American theatres, according to figures from box-office tracker Exhibitor Relations.
Speaking about 300, i personally love the show to bits. Spartans?! A shout out to all pre-historic and war world I & II fans?! WHOO!! WHOO!! WHOO!!
The film has angered Iranian authorities who complain it portrays their ancient ancestors as savages(Had a great laugh). Come to think about it, the current Iranians are the same? Give up on that damn nuclear reactor will you, slaves bullies with gold laces all over the face..
Hollywood star Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt plans to build a "Rainbow" family, it stands for children of different ethnic groups all all over the world. The current activities they are carrying out deserve a loud shout out of praises all everyone. World Peace ya?
Jet Li is back, and back from B.C, he will be staring in a Chinese themed "Mummy 3", the popular epic story of Mummies from Egypt, wanna catch Mummies twisted with kung fu moves? Maybe this is the one?
Leonardo DiCaprio and Kate Winslet are to reunite on screen for the first time since their 1997 blockbuster "Titanic". The duo will star as a suburban couple struggling to grapple with post war disillusionment in an adaptation of Richard Yates's 1961 novel "Revolutionary Road." The guys must be wondering, "will there be any paintings again?" ^^
Tuesday, March 20, 2007
Monday, March 12, 2007
Friday, March 09, 2007
News fast forwarded
the "war against terrorism" (how many people died, how many bomb blasts, how many suspected insurgents were captured, how many suicide bombers carry out their trade for the first and last time), the white house, the president election in 2008, the gun man and how many victims he caused in US, the rape and serial killers around the world. everyday, with out fail, these news will be headlines and surface in the news circulated around the world.
in Singapore, it will be the 2007 budget and the parliament talks, everything that occured in Asean and beyond, the occasional murder cases, hdb engulfs in fire, the avian flu and what the government can do for you.
the "war against terrorism" (how many people died, how many bomb blasts, how many suspected insurgents were captured, how many suicide bombers carry out their trade for the first and last time), the white house, the president election in 2008, the gun man and how many victims he caused in US, the rape and serial killers around the world. everyday, with out fail, these news will be headlines and surface in the news circulated around the world.
in Singapore, it will be the 2007 budget and the parliament talks, everything that occured in Asean and beyond, the occasional murder cases, hdb engulfs in fire, the avian flu and what the government can do for you.
Thursday, March 08, 2007
i now truely know what i want and what i really need to do. will sacrifice all the onerous events and playful thoughts. matured after what happened this few weeks of undergoing constant endless flow of problems. but it has really enlighten me about things i thought is prudent to delay till i'm older. but my dreams and aspiration are all in front of me, such opportunity i will not forgo. the opportunity is given to everyone but is how you alter and configure it to suit one. and you are given a choice to capitulate or resist it. i have so much backing and furtherance from people around me, so i'm obligated in another way.
Monday, March 05, 2007
had been an glorious week end. witnessed the champ in the making. luck or no luck, it was a display of true champion quality and resistances. i'm talking about liverpool vs MAN UTD. liverpool attacked almost the whole day but they failed to take their chances, no one else to blame i guess. in the 91 min when MAN UTD best chance came, they grabbed it with both arms securely and make the best out of it. liverpool's 30 unbeaten home game record was oozed out, and i bet it was the most devastating blow they had. if MAN UTD played well, maybe they will feel better but it was a sucker punch that landed right in their nose and brought them back to reality. no intention for any provocative moves, but gotta admit that they found it hard to win us even though they played well. statistic proves they play much better at home against MAN UTD but the final scores for the past few seasons says it all. there were butterflies in my stomach when giggs set up the free kick and i vision a goal. when it drove into the back of the net. i springed out of my couch with fists storming towards the sky. looking at my counter parts constituding of dad, bro and hj, all in foul mood with what they witnessed, the heart wrecking and vicious goal. beauty, it was beauty to me.
Thursday, March 01, 2007
in the news: a 9 year old girl gave birth.
can you believe it?? 9 year old.. oh god.. what's wrong with her. she was not rape. it was consentual copulation. she met her bf in her PRIMARY school, i repeat PRIMARY school and they have weekly sexual intercourse at her house weekly. a p3 girl gets interested in such act? very sick? almost spoilt my appetite yesterday. how did these 2 minors, really really minors have such raging and empowering urge of making love. sick really sick.
can you believe it?? 9 year old.. oh god.. what's wrong with her. she was not rape. it was consentual copulation. she met her bf in her PRIMARY school, i repeat PRIMARY school and they have weekly sexual intercourse at her house weekly. a p3 girl gets interested in such act? very sick? almost spoilt my appetite yesterday. how did these 2 minors, really really minors have such raging and empowering urge of making love. sick really sick.
Monday, February 26, 2007
something i learnt from our department's commerence this morning, a colleague was quoted saying: " never judge an idea from judgement of that person ". come to think about it, it's very true and everyone would have practiced it before. you look at the person you dislike with a prejudiced and discriminated eye. and when that person gives an idea or comment, you will think what a egoistic, and think he is uttering bull shit. i wont dare say i never done it as i practice such an act too. when i dislike someone, i really dislikes that person. anything that comes out from his mouth are bulls and craps and i would really just wanna ask him to shut the hell up.
watching ching gay on saturday from the V.I.P stand was an awesome and pleasant experience. the service from the volunteer youth was not that efficient but is alright. we were like so close to the performers in front and was like only 6m away from Senior Minister Goh and the rest of the V.V.I.P. all the Ministers of parilment were present. some of them even took part in the event. had a great time and laugh with the gf and snuff. all the special effects and performences were only made visible for the V.I.P stand as the tv crew were situated there to catcher the on going performances and the Ministers. we can derive that the whole event were made up of loads of time and hard work + practice.
Friday, February 23, 2007
Thursday, February 22, 2007
`in the news: Bangladesh outlawed plastic bags after they blocked drains and contributed to flooding.
hmmm.. with the rising sea level ploughing onto the land of Bangladesh each year and claiming hundreds of life. they refuse to listen and carry out more "activities" that constitute more to their natural hazard. wonder what is wrong with the people there?! it will be a prudent idea to have a Bangladesh National Environment Agency there, they seriously need profuse amount of cleaning up.
if they want to be obstinate about doing so, the repurcussion of it will drive Bangladesh into a underwater city, and no i mean noooo archaeologist would wanna uncover or explore a underworld city like their 3000 years later. no treasure, no prize procession, no magnificent history or culture that anyone would want to know. unless they get out of their farms, discover the world and advance them selves.
hmmm.. with the rising sea level ploughing onto the land of Bangladesh each year and claiming hundreds of life. they refuse to listen and carry out more "activities" that constitute more to their natural hazard. wonder what is wrong with the people there?! it will be a prudent idea to have a Bangladesh National Environment Agency there, they seriously need profuse amount of cleaning up.
if they want to be obstinate about doing so, the repurcussion of it will drive Bangladesh into a underwater city, and no i mean noooo archaeologist would wanna uncover or explore a underworld city like their 3000 years later. no treasure, no prize procession, no magnificent history or culture that anyone would want to know. unless they get out of their farms, discover the world and advance them selves.
Wednesday, February 21, 2007
Friday, February 16, 2007
Rain fell upon me
Washing my tears away
They bloom like flowers
During the breaking of dawn
Was in such dismal
Was so disoriented
Felt like I was being eradicated
Slowly and painfully
Taking my soul away
Now that I have found you
I never felt cold and forlorn
As you shone warmth onto me
Bringing back the smiles that
Was lost for so long
Indulge in me my love
For I have pledge myself to you
Unconditionally and without reservation
That our love shall go on
Sailing endlessly thru everything
Another gift for you.. (=
Washing my tears away
They bloom like flowers
During the breaking of dawn
Was in such dismal
Was so disoriented
Felt like I was being eradicated
Slowly and painfully
Taking my soul away
Now that I have found you
I never felt cold and forlorn
As you shone warmth onto me
Bringing back the smiles that
Was lost for so long
Indulge in me my love
For I have pledge myself to you
Unconditionally and without reservation
That our love shall go on
Sailing endlessly thru everything
Another gift for you.. (=
Thursday, February 15, 2007
14 Feb, a day where couples commemorate valentine day. this is not only the day of the year that you treat your love ones with extra care, love, presents or suprise. love has to be carried out everyday and not only on the special day.
could imagine couples flocking to town last night, some ate at posh restaurant, and some at fast food restaurant, with a bouquet of flowers or just a stalk. hmmm..
the gf and i decided to eat in yesterday to avoid the massive crowd. sent a rsvp to me be on time as she was the chef for the day. she can really cook now. the pasta, corn beef, soup with abalone and pizza was coated with an extra ingredient, sweet sweet love.
but the sad thing was our gifts for each other was either too short or too small. i intended to give her a pony polo tee but it was too short, so gave it to her mum and another one to her dad. i'm no rich kid. they treated me so well so i think they should get some repayment from me? hahas. her dad gave me another polo tee from Ash Worth. a collectable limited edition polo given to him by the Ash Worth owner. not going to wear it. not going to let anyone touch it. too pricey for any of the aforementioned.
anyway, wishing all a belated valentine day.
could imagine couples flocking to town last night, some ate at posh restaurant, and some at fast food restaurant, with a bouquet of flowers or just a stalk. hmmm..
the gf and i decided to eat in yesterday to avoid the massive crowd. sent a rsvp to me be on time as she was the chef for the day. she can really cook now. the pasta, corn beef, soup with abalone and pizza was coated with an extra ingredient, sweet sweet love.
but the sad thing was our gifts for each other was either too short or too small. i intended to give her a pony polo tee but it was too short, so gave it to her mum and another one to her dad. i'm no rich kid. they treated me so well so i think they should get some repayment from me? hahas. her dad gave me another polo tee from Ash Worth. a collectable limited edition polo given to him by the Ash Worth owner. not going to wear it. not going to let anyone touch it. too pricey for any of the aforementioned.
anyway, wishing all a belated valentine day.
Wednesday, February 14, 2007
can anyone w/o any external help tell me what are the 7 wonders of the world?
did you know that there was 7 wonders for the anicent world, 7 wonders for the middle age, 7 modern wonders, tourist travel wonders, natural wonders, underwater wonders and the new 7 wonders?
the 7 wonders keep changing like how the society is changing. but i just wonder how history can be changed, thought there was only this saying.. "history has repeated itself"
hmmmm
did you know that there was 7 wonders for the anicent world, 7 wonders for the middle age, 7 modern wonders, tourist travel wonders, natural wonders, underwater wonders and the new 7 wonders?
the 7 wonders keep changing like how the society is changing. but i just wonder how history can be changed, thought there was only this saying.. "history has repeated itself"
hmmmm
Tuesday, February 13, 2007
Monday, February 12, 2007
fatigued
imagine your friends has nothing to do for now but you are all in the same company. and on the first day of commercing work, you got into a department you abhore. the job scope is data entry and SPSS. super boring stuff for someone like me. sigh. after meeting my supervisor, my colleague handed me 3 pile of papers. it was the balance sheets of all the RC's in Singapore. all together there were 540. it took me 4 hours to go thru only 70 of it. is crazy work. on top of that. i need to complete a marketing project by myself. wonderful ya. some one send help here.
imagine your friends has nothing to do for now but you are all in the same company. and on the first day of commercing work, you got into a department you abhore. the job scope is data entry and SPSS. super boring stuff for someone like me. sigh. after meeting my supervisor, my colleague handed me 3 pile of papers. it was the balance sheets of all the RC's in Singapore. all together there were 540. it took me 4 hours to go thru only 70 of it. is crazy work. on top of that. i need to complete a marketing project by myself. wonderful ya. some one send help here.
Sunday, February 11, 2007
exams over. attachment begins. the education system here seriously need to have a restructure. study till 25 for the guys, for a degree and work your guts out till you retire. it's like so mandatory. is this what's life only about? proven so cylical for everyone. repetitions can seen from your family it self. cry when you are a baby. ask for toys when you are 2. start throwing tantrum when you are 4 and refuse to go to school on the 1st day of pri 1. life get a nasty turn if you fall into back company when you are going thru puberty. go pre college or poly after that.. ns for the guys degree for the ladies. for those who dont want to pursue masters. is work all the way till 62 or later(now you can chose). start a family at 30. and your kids will cry and do everything you done when you were young. so did god created life to be cylical? no one can tell..
if the world stop it's orbit around the sun. what will happen to mother earth? think hard before answering..
if the world stop it's orbit around the sun. what will happen to mother earth? think hard before answering..
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